Last week we saw just how desperate Labour are to raise a bit of cash – Andy Burnham is shameless to even consider doling out OBEs to pensioners who can afford to hand back three years’ worth of their state pension!

In what world would anyone find this an acceptable way to scrape together a bit of cash? Giving away gongs like jellybeans instantly makes the honour worthless, and that goes for the bought and paid for ones and the real deal version earned for excellence in a given field.

Speaking of trashing the reputation of a much-valued institution that recognises excellence there’s a secretive government office, the Honours Forfeiture Committee, specially set up to stop people brining the UK Honours system into disrepute. I should know since they’ve had two goes at grabbing back my OBE. Their most recent attempt was something I said on X which they didn’t understand, and back down my throat they jumped.

It’ll get sorted out. My lawyers are on the case. But after floating such an insane idea of literally selling off the nation’s jewels why doesn’t this undercover committee investigate Andy Burnham on the same ‘disrepute’ charge.

And whatever the outcome of my OBE investigation if this crazy plan to sell gongs goes ahead I will be at the front of a very long queue to hand my OBE back.